J. Alexander Cohen

Cozy-adjacent fantasy author

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Sugar and Spice: Sex and Cozy Fantasy

Posted on January 19, 2024January 19, 2024 by jalexandercohen

(Content warning: There’s sex in them thar spoiler blocks below)

Does sex belong in cozy fantasy?

Yes. Next post.

Seriously, though. We’re still at the start of the cozy fantasy boom (please, let there be a boom) and the definitions of what is and isn’t cozy fantasy are shaking out. You can take the pulse of (some) cozy fantasy readers on Reddit’s /r/cozyfantasy subreddit. There I’ve seen people looking for books with no love story at all, but for the most part people want at least a bit romance. Often, m/m or sapphic.

Legends and Lattes, the current cozy fantasy standard-bearer, has a very very mild sapphic romance. An incredibly slow burn between the two leads, culminating in one or two kisses at the end. Then they move in together. L&L has been very influential on cozy fantasy as a whole, so it doesn’t surprise me that these three elements pop up in other cozy fantasy books:

  • Slow burn
  • Sapphic or m/m
  • Chaste (as opposed to chased)

I can understand the appeal of no sex (or off-page sex) in cozy fantasy. In my upcoming novel, Talio’s Codex, I had a couple of relatively explicit sex scenes – but it’s what I call ‘cozy fantasy noir.’ When I got down to writing The Library at Eventide, I found myself shying away from on-page sex scenes. There’s something about cozy that seems to prompt it: maybe the gentleness of the other scenes, and the focus on family and friends? I’m not sure.

I do think sex belongs in cozy fantasy, at some level. Sex is a very human activity, most of us do it in some way or another, and it goes a long way towards rounding out a boring Wednesday evening.

That said, it’s important to be aware of what cozy readers wants and expects.

Author’s notes and content warnings can point them to things like sex scenes before they buy or read a book. One of the problems is scale: my racy might be your mild, just as my ‘relatively non-violent’ might be your ‘too upsetting.’ I’ve seen scales of sex like the one on All About Romance. Even there, I’m not quite sure where the lines are drawn between warm, hot and burning. Maybe it’s like the US Supreme Court said once: “I know it when I see it.”

I propose an MPAA-style rating system for sex in cozy fantasy:

  • A (all right, A doesn’t exist in movie ratings, but I’m adding it here): No romance and therefore no sex. A for aromantic.
  • G: Romance, but chaste. Kissing, hugs, holding hands.
  • PG: Fade to black. Sex scenes occur off-page, but it’s clear they occur. Some on-page foreplay.
  • R: Sex scenes on-page. It’s very clear what’s being done to whom, but explicit terms aren’t used.
  • NC-17: Sex scenes on-page, using explicit words for anatomy and sexual positions.

Note that I don’t have a rating for ‘sex without romance.’ There’s nothing wrong with casual sex, but I don’t see it showing up in cozy fantasy. I could be wrong, though.

Here are a couple of examples distinguishing PG from R.

PG Sex Scene Example

From The Library at Eventide:

Click to view

Garris looked down at him. “It’s pouring out there. Come inside and take those wet clothes off before you catch a cold.” Grinning, Eran did as he was told and climbed in through the window.

(next chapter) Eran awoke the next morning to sunlight streaming in through the open cottage window. His arms were wrapped around Garris’s hulking body, the two of them making the most of the narrow bedding.

R Sex Scene Example

From Talio’s Codex:

Click to view

He felt his other hand pushing his head sideways against the sheets, pinning him in place. The man grunted in anger and lowered himself onto him. And then in one swift stroke, he penetrated him and Talio cried out. It was pain and pleasure mixed. The other man did not stop. He slid in and out, faster and faster, hand pushing the side of Talio’s head down into the bed as he rode him in a fury.

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Category: Cozy Writing, Fiction

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  • Biography
  • Contact Me
  • Links
  • Newsletter Signup
  • Published Works
  • Talio Rossa and the Elixir of Life (Novel, Forthcoming)
  • Talio's Codex (Novel)
  • The Library at Eventide (Novel, Querying)
  • Upcoming Works
  • "Cozy adjacent"?

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